Funny Situations
by Ran Nuankai
Summary: The title says it all. Featuring RE2 & RE4 characters. Note: I'm posting this fic for my 10 year old sister Ayane Haruno. Characters are O0C. This is her 1st fic. Read and Review, please. Rated T for situations.
1. Who's going to be Leader?

**A/N-Hi, my name is nichole hahn. This story was written by my 10 year old sister-Angel aka _Hamster Luver_ (all feedback should be addressed to her). She is too young to join (age limit is 13), so I did her a favor of putting it up under my account. Ain't I the Sweetest big sister? It's written ENTIRELY the way she wrote it. She wouldn't have it any other way, for it wouldn't be hers if it wasn't. I also proof read her story for any spelling errors. Any way, I hope you enjoy. And remember to be considerate. After all, she is only 10. **

**FunnySituations **

Chapter 1- _Who should be the Leader?_

**Leon, Claire and Ashley were trying to find out 'Who was going to be the Leader, when Ashley saw a zombie. She said, "Leon, Claire, a zombie is coming for us!" But Leon and Claire didn't hear Ashley, because they were still arguing over who should be the Leader of their group.**

**Ashley pulled out her grenade and threw it at the zombie. Of course it died. Leon said, "What the… Ashley! Why did you throw a grenade at _1_ zombie! You're only supposed to use grenades on 'zombies', plural. You are so Stupid!"**

**"Don't yell at her! Claire yelled.**

**"Don't worry, Claire." Looking at Leon, she said, "Leon, you want to play? I'll show you how to play this game!"**

**"What game?" Leon asked.**

**"The game, where I use my grenades to kill you!"**

**BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! Grenades and guns were going off. A piece of shrapnel knocked off a moon charm on Ashley's bracelet, so she went ahead and took off the bracelet. Some of Leon's hair came out. He was so mad. Claire and Ashley pulled out their guns and shot at Leon. Claire said, "Calm down, Leon. No need to have a tantrum and have your hair coming out." They both laughed hard at that. Then Ashley asks Claire, "Who should be the Leader?"**

**"I'm the Leader, and that's final." Leon said.**

**Claire said, "No you ain't!"**

**Ashley was laughing at their argument. Leon was ready to choke her, but Claire kept him busy so he couldn't get to Ashley. Ashley pulled out a grenade launcher and shot Leon. **

**"Oh no! Ashley, why did you shoot Leon with a grenade launcher?"**

**"I didn't like him."**

**"Now you're going to die, Ashley! This is for my love!"**

**"No, you're going to die." They shot at each other, but their aim was awful. So, they stopped. And started apologizing.**

**"I'm sorry for shooting Leon, Claire."**

**"I'm sorry for shooting at you, Ashley."**

**"No, I'm sorry for shooting at you, Claire." They were running to hug each other, when Salazar used his rocket launcher and shot at Claire. Ashley ran and grabbed Salazar, and they both fell down a hole. Claire saw an explosive tank right next to her. One of Salazar's people shot it and it killed Claire. What they didn't know was that, it would kill them too. **

**"Thank God, I fell on Salazar." Ashley says as she climbs out of the hole. She looks around and sees the ash mark of Claire. She knows she's dead.**

**She turns back around and looks in the hole.**

**"Ahhhh, the pain! I think all my bones are broke." He looks up at her.**

**"Thanks for breaking my fall Salazar." She says waving and smiling.**

**"Ohhhh!" Salazar cries.**

**"Bye." She skips to a building and enters.**

**_Stay tuned for chapter 2, involving Ashley, of course, Ada, Krauser and Chief Mendez. Bye._**

_**Posted by: nichole hahn **_

_**Written by: 10 year old Hamster Luver**_


	2. What are you doing here?

**A/N 1- See chapter 1**

**A/N 2-Special thanks to AnimaSola for showing me that someone else, besides my big sister, liked my Resident Evil fan fiction. **

**Chapter 2- What are you doing here?**

**Ashley was walking through the door, when she paused. Somewhere in that area, someone was talking about some guy named Master Chief…. Wait! This isn't Halo. I mean some guy named Chief Mendez. Got to stop thinking about Halo. Not wanting to find out who those people were, Ashley runs down the hallway, she trips over the head of a zombie and screams. A door opens, and out comes Ada. **

**"Are you okay?**

**"Yes. But what are you doing here Ada?"**

**Before Ada can answer, Krauser comes running down the hall towards them.**

**"What are you doing here, Krauser?" Ada asks.**

**"Well, let's see. I'm looking for Leon."**

**"Oh. I killed him with my grenade launcher." Krauser and Ada were puzzled. **

**"HaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHa." They both thought it was funny, seeing how they didn't believe her.**

**"What happened to Claire? You know those two are always together." Ada asked.**

**"Ohh……She's dead too. Salazar shot at her with his rocket launcher."**

**Krauser was so angry that he was screaming, "I was supposed to kill Leon! AhAhAhAh!" He tried to stab Ashley in the neck. She dodged it, and took her magnum out and started shooting at his face. **

**"OwOwOwOw! Stop that hurt!" Ashley looked at Krauser and the gun, confused. **

**Ada laughed so hard, she was rolling in the dirt. "What's so funny, Ada?" Krauser asked, rubbing his face.**

**"That gun isn't a magnum. HeHeHe. It's a bee bee gun! HaHaHaHaHaHaHa!" Ada continued to laugh.**

**"I don't care what it was. It hurt." Ada was quiet. **

**"Well, actually I'm glad it wasn't the magnum. Seeing how I don't want to die." At that, Ada went back to laughing.**

**After she knew it wasn't her magnum, but a bee bee gun, Ashley tried to figure out what happened. How her magnum got switched with a bee bee gun. Then she figured it out. When they first started out, Leon asked her to see her gun. She said ok, and handed it to him. He handed it back to her with a smile. She had thought he was impressed that she had a magnum. Now she knew that he had switched her magnum with a bee bee gun. Man was she glad that she had killed him with her grenades.**

**"We're leaving. You coming with?" Krauser asks Ashley.**

**"Where are you going?"**

**"To find our way out of here. Since you killed Leon, I have no reason to stay."**

**"Oh…Okay, I'll go with. We have strength in numbers anyway." She walks up to them.**

**"What kind of strength in numbers you talking about? There's only 3 of us!"**

**"Krauser shut you mouth." Ada says.**

**"I'm for real."**

**"Do you want to be by yourself, Krauser?" Ada asks.**

**"H E double hockey sticks NO!"**

**"Then Shut it!"**

**"Wait you guys. I hear something." Ashley says.**

**"I don't hear anything. Do you hear something, Ada?"**

**"No." They're all looking around.**

**"I think you need to clean your ears out, Ashley."**

**"Shut you up, Krauser!" They both yelled. All was quiet.**

**Ada in a whisper, "If there was some_thing_ out there, it knows where we are now."**

**"It is something out there." Ashley says.**

**"Oh mommy, I'm scared!" Krauser cries and climbs on Ada.**

**"Get off me, fool! I ain't your mama!" He climbs off with some tugging from Ashley.**

**"You're a grown man. Crying for your mama._Oh mommy, I'm scared!_"**

**"Stop it, Ashley." Ada says.**

**"Sorry."**

**"Honestly. I'm better off by myself. I don't have no kids." She starts to walk off.**

**"Oh please, don't leave us." They run to catch up with her.**

**'HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHeHeHeHeHeHeHeHeHeHeHeHeHe.'**

**"Did anybody hear it this time?" Ashley asks.**

**"I'm afraid I did." Ada says.**

**"I think I wet my pants." They both look at Krauser. He shrugs.**

**'HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHeHeHeHeHeHeHeHeHeHeHeHeHe.'**

**"Everybody get your weapons AAR." Ada said.**

**"What's AAR mean?"**

**Krauser leans over to Ashley, "Armed and Ready."**

**"Oh. I get it."**

**"Oh man, that's Chief Mendez." Krauser says.**

**"That's him? Man he's tall." Ashley comments.**

**"How tall are you anyway?"**

**"6'7''."**

**"Wow. That's impressive. Like, how much do you weigh?"**

**"500 something lbs."**

**"You could like, sit on us and we wouldn't be able to get up?"**

**"I like to think so. Yeah." Chief Mendez says.**

**"Wow again." Ada and Krauser look at them.**

**"Forget this!" Ada shoots Chief Mendez with her rocket launcher. It does zero damage. He continues to walk slowly towards them.**

**Krauser shoots him with fire grenades. That also does nothing. **

**"I can't believe we're going to die like this." Ada says to Krauser.**

**They grab each other. "There's something I've been meaning to tell you, Ada."**

**"What's that?"**

**"I, I….I."**

**"Spit it out, Krauser. We're going to die."**

**"I hope he kills you first!"**

**Chief Mendez stops. He grabs Krauser by the throat, and slams him.**

**While his back is turned to her, Ashley remembers she still has her grenades, and throws them at him. He drops Ada and turns to Ashley. **

**"You hit me in the head with something. Why? I thought we were beginning to be friends."**

**"Do you even know my name?"**

**"It's Amy." Ashley shakes her head.**

**"Amanda." She shakes her head.**

**"Alexandra." She shakes her head again.**

**"Alison."**

**"No. It's Ashley. And now you die." He looks down and the grenades explode. And bits and pieces of him are flying every where.**

**It's on Ashley's shirt and skirt, and Ada's hair.**

**"Ewwwww. It got me in the face." Krauser hollers, jumping up and down.**

**Ashley looks around to see if there's anything else coming for them. There isn't. She hears a loud 'pop' sound and looks at Ada. Krauser was on the ground with blood pouring out of his stomach.**

**"He shouldn't have wished me to die first." Ada said.**

**"But I thought he was your partner?"**

**"Nope. He was working for Salazar. I work independently."**

**"Oh."**

**"You know, Krauser was here to kill all of us who know what's going on around here." **

**"What's going on around here? Ashley asks.**

**Ada thinks about that, and decides not to answer. "Now who's dead first?" She asks the corpse of Krauser.**

**They look at each other and laugh.**

_**I hope you liked this chapter. Chapter 3 has Ada, Ashley, Saddler and an unexpected guest. Ooooo.**_

_**Posted by: nichole hahn**_

_**Written by: 10 year old Hamster Luver**_


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